What it means to be a dad

“Wrestle time!” 

That’s pretty much all my 5 year old son says whenever he sees me. First thing in the morning or late at night, it doesn’t matter he’s always up for a fight. He tries to think of put downs to really get me going. The other week he put his tough guy face on and called me a “rubber ducky” — the ultimate throw down! This week, he fine tuned his verbal barrage and goaded me into another rumble by calling me an “old man”. We took it to the park, shirts and shoes off, no holds barred. Forty year old verses five year old. The dog walkers in the park were quite amused to see this shirtless duo of father and son engaged in mortal combat. There was a pause in the melee:

“Dad, were not allowed to hit each other in the penis right?”

“That’s right son” 

The dog walkers chuckled. Fists and feet flailed away once again.

A homeless guy passed out in the park, woke up, squinted, and looked over in our direction, trying to figure out what the ruckus was all about. He finally did, and stumbled over to us. He watched for a few minutes and then said.

“Dude I need a woman, so I can have a son, cause what your doing is f***ing awesome!”

He wandered off. The fight ended, and we headed back for supper, sweaty, sticky, itchy, dirty, scrapped, bruised and happy. My son’s efforts earned him a shoulder ride home. He had four helpings for dinner, and made no objections when it was bed time.

As Father’s Day comes upon us, my appeal is specifically for fathers to be fathers to their sons. Young boys don’t need gadgets and television shows to occupy their time. They don’t need physically or mentally absent fathers preoccupied with trivial matters like making money or advancing a career. They don’t need dads who spend most of their time in vain pursuits and selfish hobbies. They need dads who will get dirty with them, who will wrestle, who will roar with their sons like lions, who will go on adventures, take risks, and scrape knees together. Dads committed to walking out perilous exploits and daring feats that require courage, bravery, responsibility, and hard work from their sons. This is fathering and the homeless dude was right, it’s f***ing awesome!